Humor/Comedy

Starting in the fall of 2012, Independent Philly will be holding a comedy showcase at a great center city venue (details coming soon). The show will take place one Thursday night a month from 8-10 PM and will feature some of the area’s best up-and-coming stand-up comedians (as well as guest performers). If you are interested in performing please drop us an email at phillyindependent@gmail.com

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Our editor, David Miller, recently competed in Philly’s Funniest Person contest at Helium on Monday, August 13th, 2012. You can check out a video of his performance, shot by one of our staff members, by clicking here!

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You will also find humorous articles on several topics available from time to time below.

(disclaimer: not for the faint of heart or for those easily offended by the use of colorful language)

July 30th, 2012:

IT’S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE THAT THIS IS THE BEST ARTICLE EVER WRITTEN
On a recent trip to the News Museum (Newseum) in Washington, DC, I had the chance to read headlines from newspapers all around the world. Although I can’t recall the title of the publication, one headline (from a newspaper in the U.S.) stuck in my head. Is it the worst headline I’ve ever seen? It’s right up there. The headline read:
“Will The Economy Rebound in 2012? Maybe.”
Maybe?!? The first job of a headline is to grab your attention and drag the reader in. From the headline alone I know I’m not going to get any definitive information out of the story. Why keep reading? It led me to consider writing personalized headline greeting cards to people I don’t really like. Here are a few ideas I had:

“Extra! Extra! Is Your Girl Friend Cheating On You? Maybe.”
“You Are Potentially the Ugliest One in Your Family”
“Something Sure Smells Bad. It’s Probably You”
“Your Parents Say You Weren’t A Mistake. Are They Lying? Maybe.”

I could scrap the whole greeting card idea and go to work for a major paper armed with my new journalistic tools instead. The articles would practically write themselves.

“Man Shot by Police in Liquor Store Hold up Was Probably Guilty”
“Could You Be Saving Money on Your Bills? I Guess So.”
“Iraq Might Still Have Weapons of Mass Destruction, Somewhere.”
“Gas Prices Drop, But They Could Go Back Up”
“Will Your Child Turn Into a Gremlin If You Feed Them After Midnight? I Fucking Dare You To Try It.”

Come on journalists! We have a reputation to uphold. If you think the economy will rebound, state your case for it. If you think it will continue to decline then present your evidence to that end. I know I write a lot of puff pieces but for such a serious topic you should take a serious stand on one side or the other.

-D.M.

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